VD’s Grandfather
I had a friend who was more popularly known by his initial ‘VD’ (These initials also stand for ‘Venereal Disease). This was quite an appropriate name as most of the time had a disheveled appearance, hair unkempt and clothes crumpled. He was also fond of smoking a joint once in while so he was also known as ‘Weeds’.
His Grandfather was the retired Director General of the Police of Tamil Nadu. Now VD claimed he smoked joints even in his Grandfather’s place, usually in the bathroom. Our reaction was “VD how stupid! A policeman will be able to recognize the smell of a joint and your Grandfather was no ordinary Cop”. VD was under the delusion that his Grandfather didn’t even know he smoked!
Now I had to go to Madras for some work and VD invited me to his Grandfather’s place. The old man had a massive bungalow in Kelly in Madras. There were couple of other houses in the compound. The inside of the house had a central drawing room with all the rooms surrounding it. So all the rooms in the house opened into the drawing room. The bedrooms had attached bathrooms which had a door opening outside to allow the sweepers to clean them. This was quite a typical old British design. VD introduced me to his Grandfather, telling the old man how intelligent and religious I was he also added in private that I being his senior would be very useful in furthering his career. Then he popped the question to the old man, “can my friend stay for dinner and overnight?” The old man reacted. “how can I feed an unexpected guest, no your friend should leave after some time”. Well then VD took me to his bedroom we sat there for some time then we left via the drawing room. The old man had his bed in the drawing room. I bade farewell to the old man. Then VD took me around the house and back into his bedroom via the bathroom entrance. VD’s cousin who lived upstairs also joined us and we poured out some drinks and had a party. Meanwhile the old man would intermittently shout, “Bambi (he was know by that name to his family) what is happening? VD would go reassure is Grandfather that it was only his cousin and him talking. Now it became dinner time so VD’s cousin and I volunteered to get some Chinese food from a nearby restaurant. So we left via the bathroom exit. While we were away VD decided to have a joint in the bathroom so he closed the door after that he went off to sleep. When we returned with the food we found ourselves locked out and through the window we could see VD fast asleep. We were faced with the problem of waking him up without waking up the old man but VD was dead to the world. So we tried to dislodge the bolt of the door. It so happened that the bolt gave away with a noise which woke up both VD and the old man. We ducked in the bushes in the darkness. When the old man was pacified by VD the party restarted. This time the old man was really suspicious and instead of shouting got up from his bed took a torch and shuffled towards the bedroom. I immediately hid in the bathroom the old man after inspecting the bedroom came into the bathroom. I hid flush against the wall next to the door. The beam of the torch caught my feet then traced my form upwards, “What are you doing here?” said the old man, “Come sleep near me and he took me to the drawing room and made me lie down on a sofa near his bed. VD meanwhile started arguing with his Grandfather saying, because you did not allow him to stay we had to resort to this. The old man calmly replied, “you are drunk now we will discuss it in the morning”. The next morning I got up had breakfast with the old man apologized to him which he accepted graciously and I returned to my hostel.